Question
I am looking for the best way to create a private residential garden.  This is the type of garden that a very busy person would love to return to and relax after a stressful day.  It would have to be totally private.

Answer
Ken,
Wow,that's a big project.The best thing for you to do is to sit down and write a list of the features and plants you are interested in using.Also areas that are the focal points of your garden.For instance:What will you be doing most in your garden?Entertaining,relaxing,playing with kids or pets,etc.
Some features could be a sitting area,a barbeque area,a fountain,a pathway to a secret garden,moonlight garden,butterfly garden,a patch of lawn,etc.
Also fencing and privacy and noise reduction screening will be a very important feature I would say.
Choosing plants is very important,but that would come last.

First thing is getting the lay of the garden by taking strategic photos with any type camera,making sure to get all areas in view.This will give you an idea of how much work needs to be done on just laying the ground.You may have lots of brush or tree removal,adding soil,perhaps some small berms,pathways,patios,screening,etc.

If you have children and/or pets,this you will have to take into very careful condideration.That changes every aspect,believe me,I know,I have kids and pets.
Also,climate and location are equally important.If you are in a wind,rain or drought prone area,that needs to be considered as well.
Choosing a landscape designer is really the best thing to do,but if you choose to go it alone,you should check out some Do-It-Yourself books at Lowes or Home Depot or even the public library,which is what I did when I first started gardening.I packed out no telling how many heavy,picture laden gardening books.
It is a daunting task and you have to go slowly if you want to conserve on your budget.
If your budget is not a problem however then a designer is the way to go.
If you have any more questions,just ask.